My name is Kristine. I’m a wife, mother, daughter, sister, and friend.
I grew up in Michigan. I love running, cooking, and Diet Coke. I shamelessly collect pens. The smell of the outdoors replenishes my sanity. I love to tell stories. My heart belongs to Jesus.
I am one of three sisters. I went to college at the University of Michigan in Ann Arbor, and I graduated in 2008 with my Bachelors in Psychology.
I have been married to my husband Jon since 2011. We met in 2007, playing pool with friends at a bar in Ann Arbor. I told him my name was Jessica, but in fact, I was wearing a necklace with my real name. I believe this made me appear mysterious. Whatever the reason it started, I’m so thankful we kept talking. No one on Earth understands me like Jon. I thank God every day that He crossed our paths and brought us together.
We make our home about 30 minutes outside of Boston with our two young daughters: Gracie Kate (3) and Avery Joy (1). We lost our first daughter, Darla Jane, in 2013. She was born at 30 weeks, with multiple abnormalities. Darla passed 12 hours after she was born. In this, our marriage was tested, and our hearts were changed.
I started writing out of necessity, very unintentionally. I used blogging as a way to keep family and friends updated during my high-risk pregnancy with Darla. After she passed, I found myself connecting with more and more women through my writing about Darla. Writing became an outlet for my grief; it evolved from an easy way to hide from painful conversations to a coping mechanism, to something I genuinely love.
I never expected to lose another baby. In February of 2019, we were surprised by another pregnancy. In May of 2019, our precious pregnancy became high-risk. We found out that our first and only son may not live. Through unseen bravery by faith, I navigated this high-risk pregnancy the best I knew how. Full of ups and downs, we were unsure how it would turn out.
Due to problems with his kidneys, my amniotic fluid levels dropped steadily. At 32 weeks, it was unsafe for our baby to stay in any longer. Sharing a birthday with his dad, Cooper Gabriel was born on 9/5/19. After a month in the NICU, we said goodbye to sweet Cooper. Along with compounding health issues, his lungs faith to develop enough prenatally to support life. Affectionately called Super Cooper, our strong son traded his cape for wings and joined his sister Darla in beautiful, perfect eternity.
If I’m honest, motherhood doesn’t look like I expected. Yet, through loss of stability, loss of identity, or loss of self: I know being a mama isn’t what many women anticipate. I never thought I’d hold two of my four babies as they passed away. I mourn the chance to know them on Earth.
At the same time, the thing I feared most did not crush my hope.
The more authentically I explore the nuances of motherhood on the fringes, the more I begin to understand that this journey isn’t what I expected, because it’s more.
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Feature bridge photo credit to Audrey Nicole Photography.